The Mayor of Oklahoma City has begun an ambitious campaign for the entire city to lose weight. Unfortunately, they're not talking about urban sprawl, either.
In the Edmond Sun, an article says the mayor's goal is for the entire city to lose 1 million pounds.
The article gives the link to the city's new weight-loss website, http://www.thiscityisgoingonadiet.com/
Now I didn't know if it was an editing issue when the article made a sideways leap mid-paragraph:
"Obesity can lead to other health problems, too. This year alone, one million people in the United States will be diagnosed with cancer. Half of Oklahomans will develop cancer at some point in their lifetimes and 1-in-4 will die from the disease."
Wait...did I miss something? No, the rest of the article is entirely about the dangers of cancer, with no further mention of weight. In an article about dieting.....?
(Cue theme from the Twilight Zone)
Oh, wait, I forgot. Fat causes every disease known to man. Even hangnails and scurvy. How silly of me to think otherwise!
To quote the writers at Shapely Prose....
Oh wait, but they're not just targeting fat people this time:
"Together we can become healthier citizens of Oklahoma City. EVERYONE is encouraged to join in the OKC Million community challenge to lose a total of 1,000,000 (ONE MILLION) POUNDS in 2008!"
That's right. Apparently everyone, from athletes to anorexics, can show their civic pride by endangering their health in a crash diet. Doesn't that make you just all warm and fuzzy? Like linty goo? They even include links to Bariatric Clinics in the behavioral modification and surgical programs sections of the website. Because nothing helps to drop those pesky pounds like surgical starvation! I wonder if they put the crematorium ashes on the scale to see if they're under the person's goal weight? Sure you lost a pulse, but you lost a couple hundred pounds with it! And that's what's really important....I wonder if they knock off a couple pounds for the urn?
Oh look, they've got corporate sponsorship! Of course, all of them are Bariatric Surgery clinics:
But that doesn't mean this program is a clever advertising/moneymaking scheme by the weight loss industry. They're just concerned about your Health......It's for the Children....
You ever experience a moment when bitter and incredulous sarcasm is the only thing keeping you from screaming and throwing things?