Thursday, January 3, 2008

Mayor of OKC Calls for City to Lose 1 Million Pounds

The Mayor of Oklahoma City has begun an ambitious campaign for the entire city to lose weight. Unfortunately, they're not talking about urban sprawl, either.

In the Edmond Sun, an article says the mayor's goal is for the entire city to lose 1 million pounds.

The article gives the link to the city's new weight-loss website, http://www.thiscityisgoingonadiet.com/

Seriously?

Now I didn't know if it was an editing issue when the article made a sideways leap mid-paragraph:

"Obesity can lead to other health problems, too. This year alone, one million people in the United States will be diagnosed with cancer. Half of Oklahomans will develop cancer at some point in their lifetimes and 1-in-4 will die from the disease."

Wait...did I miss something? No, the rest of the article is entirely about the dangers of cancer, with no further mention of weight. In an article about dieting.....?

(Cue theme from the Twilight Zone)

Oh, wait, I forgot. Fat causes every disease known to man. Even hangnails and scurvy. How silly of me to think otherwise!

To quote the writers at Shapely Prose....

*Headdesk*

Oh wait, but they're not just targeting fat people this time:

"Together we can become healthier citizens of Oklahoma City. EVERYONE is encouraged to join in the OKC Million community challenge to lose a total of 1,000,000 (ONE MILLION) POUNDS in 2008!"

That's right. Apparently everyone, from athletes to anorexics, can show their civic pride by endangering their health in a crash diet. Doesn't that make you just all warm and fuzzy? Like linty goo? They even include links to Bariatric Clinics in the behavioral modification and surgical programs sections of the website. Because nothing helps to drop those pesky pounds like surgical starvation! I wonder if they put the crematorium ashes on the scale to see if they're under the person's goal weight? Sure you lost a pulse, but you lost a couple hundred pounds with it! And that's what's really important....I wonder if they knock off a couple pounds for the urn?

Oh look, they've got corporate sponsorship! Of course, all of them are Bariatric Surgery clinics:

http://www.thiscityisgoingonadiet.com/Sponsors/tabid/57/Default.aspx

But that doesn't mean this program is a clever advertising/moneymaking scheme by the weight loss industry. They're just concerned about your Health......It's for the Children....


You ever experience a moment when bitter and incredulous sarcasm is the only thing keeping you from screaming and throwing things?

6 comments:

KateHarding said...

You ever experience a moment when bitter and incredulous sarcasm is the only thing keeping you from screaming and throwing things?

All the time. The bad days are the ones when bitter and incredulous sarcasm is no longer enough.

Tari said...

You ever experience a moment when bitter and incredulous sarcasm is the only thing keeping you from screaming and throwing things?

Me, I like to combine the two. Throwing things while screaming bitter and incredulous sarcasm is totally cathartic.

But, then again, all us fat girls are really angry all the time anyway (you know, at ourselves!), so nothing new there.

Lindsay said...

From wikipedia: "The city's estimated population as of 2006 was 537,734, with a 2006 estimated population of 1,172,339 in the metropolitan area."

Which means that the average person should lose anywhere from 1.8 to .8 pounds.

I'd say something snarky, but when you look at the numbers, is it even really necessary? It really does make fun of itself.

Phledge said...

So, Lindsay, essentially what it comes down to is that if I lived in OKC I could go get weighed, then run out to the car and clip my fingernails and toenails, then run back into the building and hit the loo for a good-sized...article in the latest Economist, and then I could go back and be FREE! FREE OF FAT! Is that about what they're saying?

Lindsay said...

phledge, i think that about sums it up, yeah.

If you invest in a good fibre supplement, i'm sure that'll more than do the trick. O.o

Meowser said...

Lindsay: Lose 2 pounds (rounding up) and keep it off forever? I could do that. I think.