NPR News: Fitness a better indicator of health than fat

Hooray for the U.S.'s National Public Radio! On All Things Considered last night, a news story covered a fitness and mortality study which was published in JAMA:

"A long-term study has tracked the exercise and death rates of a few thousand Americans beginning at age 60. The new findings break those older Americans down into five groups, from the most fit to the least. Researchers documented 32 deaths per 1,000 people over the course of a year in the least fit group. This compares with 16 deaths in the group that was just slightly more fit, and eight deaths in the most-fit category"

The best part of the story was that a national news organization has finally and publicly admitted the lack of correlation between weight and fitness:

"The men and women in Blair's study may be a little more fit than older Americans in general. But among the group there were a fair number of overweight and obese participants, including individuals with a body-mass index, or BMI, of 35 and above.
"There's a sizable number, nearly half, who are fit and proved it on the treadmill test." says Blair. "So you can't tell by looking at someone whether they're physically fit.""

And everywhere, a million money-grubbing diet industry gurus cry out in a single voice.."No! Say it ain't So!"

But then, perhaps in reaction to habit, perhaps to keep the guns against him at bay so that he's not relegated instantly to the back shelf as some kind of crazy-liberal-radical, Blair stops short in his conclusion, reverting to the usual rhetoric:

"I believe we have an obesity epidemic. It's a bad sign. We should not ignore obesity," Blair said. "But what happens all too often is we focus nearly exclusively on obesity and forget the activity and fitness part." "

Most of the media coverage are emphasizing that particular quote, and the Reuter's story being distributed goes on to quote the usual CDC silliness about all the horrible things obesity is supposed to cause. Perhaps that is their attempt at removing "bias" by offering more than one viewpoint? I haven't noticed that the media cares much about offering more than one viewpoint when the article is Sizist, so why start now?

Well let's take the good we can get. When looking for more coverage on this story I found that they didn't just measure BMI when splitting participants into categories, but also included body fat percentage and waist circumference. Which means that this may be one of the first really good studies that really proves that you can be fit regardless of weight. Even better, that getting fit doesn't necessarily include losing weight:

""If you're overweight or obese and you're sedentary and unfit and you start taking three 10-minute walks a day and you do that at least five days a week, you're not going to lose an enormous amount of weight," Blair said.
"You're going to still be heavy. But you're going to be much healthier if you do that," Blair said."

Really, that's a pretty radical admission from someone in medical research, and I think we should take the study, even some of the more biased coverage of it, as a big fat positive :-)

House Tackles Fat

No, not the House of Representatives...I'm talking about the Hugh Laurie drama series on Fox.

I don't usually watch TV. I haven't watched actual TV for several months, but last night I got to curl up on the couch in a pile of blankets to watch TV, the ice forming on the inside of the windows, the thermostat dipping below 25 degrees F (-4 Celsius) while I waited for the furnace repair people to show up and figure out why I had no heat.

The cats were not impressed.

Anyway, it was uncanny how the first TV show I've watched in so many months had a fat theme. Remind me to post my theories of synchronicity at some point. Better yet, go get Jung from the library :-)

Here's the summary from Fox:

When an obese 10-year-old girl presents with a heart attack, House and his team investigate. At first thinking it’s an adverse reaction to diet pills, they ultimately uncover a much more deadly source of her illness.

It's a re-run of course, and originally broadcast in 1995 (episode #116: "Heavy") And just to cover myself, I quote the episode a few times below, and would like to point out the obvious in that I do not own House, it is owned by Fox and NBC/Universal and they retain all rights. Any quotes are definitely unofficial and from an unofficial transcript by fans.

The summary is a bit misleading, since the diet pills theory came later in the episode. At first the only cause they focus on is the girl's weight. This episode is almost an expose' on fat bias in medical treatment, and a sad testament to why fat people often don't seek medical treatment, or suffer from misdiagnosis when doctors make assumptions. For example:

Chase: She’s morbidly obese. The “morbid” part of that raises alarms.
Foreman: Come on, it takes decades to eat your way into a heart attack.
Chase: Doesn’t take decades to kill yourself. If I was that fat, I’d be pretty tempted to knock back a bottle of pills.
Cameron: It’s not a drug overdose. The fatigue, muscle pain, and difficulty concentrating have been bothering her for over a year.
Chase: That’s because of her depression.
House: That’s what five pediatricians, two nutritionists, and a psychologist said. The heart attack would seem to indicate that they missed something.
Foreman: It’s got to be something genetic.
Cameron: What about Metabolic Syndrome X?
Chase: Insulin resistance?
Foreman: Syndrome X could cause a stroke, but I don’t know about a heart attack.
House: Could, if her blood pressure was high enough.
Cameron: Which is likely, considering her weight.

Personally? I have very low blood pressure. The doctors go with this (wrong) diagnosis and subject the girl to a dangerous testing procedure that exacerbated her condition, causing an open staph infection. The only thing that gets the doctors to see past their weight bias is the mother's willingness to fight for her daughter:

Mom: She’s diabetic?
Cameron: No, but it’s similar. MSX patients don’t respond normally to insulin, which causes her body to create too much, which causes metabolic abnormalities. We’re going to do a test to be sure, but there are certain dangers.
Mom: Is this thing treatable?
Cameron: It’s controllable through proper diet and exercise.
Mom: Wait. Jessica already eats right. And she exercises every day!
Cameron: I know you’ve already seen several nutritionists –
Mom: And we’ve done everything they recommended.
Cameron: I understand, but –
Mom: Why can’t any of you doctors see past her weight? If diet and exercise are the treatment, then the diagnosis is wrong.

Go Mom! Unfortunately, while Dr. Cameron starts to learn empathy, Dr. Chase continues his fat hatred throughout the episode:

Chase: Obesity isn’t something you just grow out of.
...
Foreman: And you figure making her feel like crap would do her a world of good?
Chase: Yeah, if it gets her off the couch!
Cameron: I’m sure she’s already under enough pressure.
Chase: Enough from mummy?
Cameron: Everything in society tells us we have to be thin to be successful.
Chase: No, society tells you you have to be thin to be attractive. And guess what, that’s what attractive means: that society likes looking at you.
Cameron: I think we should be telling our kids it’s fine as long as they’re healthy.
Chase: All right. You weigh 90 pounds because it makes you healthier?

Then:

Cameron: Right, because anything's possible, but nothing's going to cause multiple clots in a kid this age.
Chase: She’s fat!
Cameron: Obesity doesn’t cause blood clots.

Then House, who at least seems to hate everyone, so the reaction is typical and somehow less offensive.

House: But what about some other ridiculous obesity treatment?
Foreman: Like what?
House: Diet pills can cause heart attacks and blood clots.
Cameron: Her tox screen was negative.
House: Wouldn’t show over-the-counter weight loss drugs.
Cameron: Her mother wouldn’t give her diet pills.
Chase: [sarcastically] Yeah, she thinks her daughter’s perfect just the way she is.
House: She’s lying.

Because a parent couldn't possibly be happy and proud of a fat daughter. Cut to the school, where Dr. Foreman is interviewing the friendless girl's assigned 8th grade "buddy"

Clementine: All she does during recess is run laps around the playground. She says she’s exercising, but everyone knows it’s just because no one wants to play with her. I mean, I’m only her buddy because Ms. Ayers assigned her to me. That does not mean I am her friend.
...
Clementine: I totally busted her for taking drugs one day. She totally lied, said they were diet pills her mom had given her. Come on, get real. No way a girl like that is taking diet pills.


And another fine example of fat hatred from Dr. Chase:

Chase: Right, so I guess it’s the media and pharmaceutical companies’ fault now?...Not the fact that she can’t stop shoving food down her throat. No one forced her to get fat.
Cameron: No one forced a cancer patient to get cancer.
Chase: Give me a break, it’s not a disease.
Foreman: Have you seen the latest research?
Chase: Yes, I have. What I haven’t seen lately is a kid eating an apple or riding a bike. You Americans can’t even compete with the rest of the world in basketball anymore, unless, of course, it’s the type you play with a remote control on a big screen TV.

And a clean miss on the fact that the girl ran laps every day...and that her diet was controlled by a nutritionist.


To wrap it up, the girl develops a staph infection and open lesions from their treatment and only when her life is at risk do they manage to get past her weight as a cause (and leap right to it as a symptom...why does it have to be related at all?) They find a tumor on her pituitary that is stunting her growth, causing her other symptoms, and making her fat.

So in this case, despite the excellent examples of fat-phobia, bias, hatred, and myth-busting, fat is still a "disease" and something to be "fixed" by the crack (or cracked?) doctors. The episode finishes off with the now taller and thinner "fixed" girl smiling for the first time in the episode.

A secondary story line is around a fat woman who comes in for heartburn. House misdiagnoses her as pregnant, despite the fact that her husband had a vasectomy and they use condoms. Even though the character is portrayed as stupid, there's some great quotes.

Lucille: Okay. [She hops off the table and gestures to herself.] This is what a woman is supposed to look like. Okay, we’re not just skin and bones. We have flesh. We have curves.
House: You have little people inside you. [Lucille grabs her purse and heads to the door.] Okay, okay, I’m sorry. I guess I must have just been brainwashed by the media, and all those years of medical training.

Later they discover that she has a record-breaking 30 pound benign tumor on her ovary. Talk about misdiagnosis. Even though the tumor is completely benign, they still assume she'll want surgery to remove it since it would also give her a flatter belly. They're shocked when she disagrees.

Lucille: I’ll have a huge scar! I won’t be able to wear a bikini!
House: You wear a bikini now?
Lucille: Yeah, you got a problem with that?
House: Nope, but I’ve never gone swimming with you.
Lucille: I knew it. That’s what this is all about! You are trying to force me to have cosmetic surgery!
House: Yeah, that’s exactly why I planted a thirty pound tumor on your ovary.
Lucille: It’s not gonna kill me. [House and Wilson share a “are you hearing what I’m hearing?” kind of look.] The only thing surgery is going to do is change the way I look. That is the definition of “cosmetic surgery”.

Woohoo! Point set match for the fat chick! Later the husband manages to convince the disbelieving Dr. House that he DOES actually like his wife's body, but convinces her to have the surgery out of fear of health complications from the tumor (which was causing her heartburn).

Ok, so that's the episode. And I can only justify such a long post about a re-run TV episode by the conflicting impressions about it. There was such a mix of sizism and size-positive in the episode that I could find something to love and hate in every scene. On the positive side it did a very good job in portraying fat bias in medicine and society. The fat hating characters actually come across as mean-spirited, ignorant and irrational, which is pretty unique in a medical show. On the other hand, the fat-positive message falls a little short. The gutsy fat chick with the tumor is portrayed as stupid and delusional, pretty much a slightly more sophisticated fat joke than usual. The fat girl shows the incredible dehumanizing treatment of fat children, but her weight is still a disease to be "fixed" instead of simply acknowledging that someone can be genetically fat despite a healthy lifestyle. The fact that it IS "fixed" in the end reinforces that mixed message. Plus there's a bit of ethnocentrism thrown in for fun, since the most vocal fat-hating doctor is Australian, and he's the only one who doesn't learn compassion or make progress towards actual size acceptance in the course of the episode. Or could it be a class-based comment, since he's also the only independently wealthy character? Hard to tell.

Santa is Undergoing a Crash Diet

Some of the buzz around the net is talking about a call from Acting U.S. Surgeon General Galston to follow in the footsteps of the British and require Santa to be thin in order to be a better role-model for kids.

In order to help Santa in his new endeavor to lose weight, children are asked to replace the traditional milk and cookies with celery sticks and herbal tea. Environmental Scientists disagree, stating that the effects of such high doses of fiber to both Santa and his reindeer may cause a significant increase in the North Pole's carbon footprint.

Now what's really scary is that I only had to make up the second half of that. The first part is true, and just asking to be Fark or Onion fodder. Santa is now apparently a lifestyle role model for hundreds of children. Perhaps the fat kids in the schoolyard are inspiring jealousy amongst the kids with the misfortune to be genetically thin.

Right.

I would dearly love to hear from anyone who deliberately ate the enormous amount that it would require to make a naturally thin person fat, simply because they took Santa as a role model. Really.

Anyone?

It says something about the primal, subconscious level of fat fear in the world that this is even an issue. It's all very Brave New World. This fear, like all phobias, persists despite all evidence that no actual danger exists. Like so many phobias, it also has a negative effect on the ability to enjoy life. Parents have been made so terrified of fat children that they take away all the traditions of holidays which we once enjoyed without fear. Trick or Treating, a candy cane from Santa, chocolate eggs at Eostre's feast, Pumpkin Pie at Thanksgiving....The strongest positive memories of childhood are often related to the sight, smell and taste of holiday foods. Mom and dad could have saved a bundle on the cool toys, because my sharpest nostalgic memories from childhood Christmas involved the smell of the tree, the sound of the music, the view of the lights when I lay down looking up through the decorations, and the taste of the orange rolls we made for every Christmas breakfast.

Oh, and the lite-bright. I take it back about the cool toys...that lite bright was awesome. First grade, I think. :-)

I understand that by religion and health, some children have different memories and associations of traditional times in their lives, but generally I think most kids grow up with at least one childhood memory that centers around food. It speaks to us on a deeper level than the glitter and flash, the family arguments, or the kitchy decorations that moulder in the attic each year. There is a reason why our most treasured holidays emphasize food. Now there is a culture-wide leeching of all the rich symbols of the seasons because of some ridiculous fear that a child may ingest too many calories or fat grams.

A life lived in fear is not lived. Whether it be a fear of terrorists that makes us hide in the house and hate our neighbors for their differences, or a fear of rejection that shrivels us up inside until we cannot bear to think of connecting to another human being. If the fear of fat is causing you to stop living or letting children live, isn't that worse than any imaginary health effects it might have? There are so many legitimate things to worry about, don't sweat what you really, really cannot change.

Ok sure, so the very traditional mythic Father Christmas/Pere Noel/Kris Kringle was a tall, thin stately figure or a slim child of the fae. Someone will probably say that they're just returning Santa to his roots (and how eager would they be to do so if they knew how oh-so-deliciously-pagan those roots were?) But the fat jolly Santa is a staple of our modern culture. He's a part of the modern mythology, for we have so few good stories left to raise the children on. How old does a tradition need to be, in order to be sacrosanct? Is there even such a thing anymore?

The Salad is Not your Enemy

I'm on a veggie crave at the moment. The Panera Mediterranean Veggie Sandwich is calling my name sweetly from afar. Ah the siren song of cilantro hummus, the sweet strains of tomato-basil bread.....



I've never been a full vegetarian, but I tend to follow my cravings as a guide for eating. Generally if you have a serious craving, it's something your body needs. Of course, everyone has their emotional "trigger" foods as well, but generally it's always better to follow your intuition when it comes to...well just about everything. On the other hand, sometimes I wonder if an aimless "snacky" craving for nothing in particular is really a grazing instinct because I'm craving something I've never tasted before. Maybe my instinct is seeking a bite of some rare Korean flavoring or a drink of some exotic fruit juice.

Well...maybe not, but it's a good excuse to learn all kinds of interesting new dishes :-)

Growing up, we had a saying about my brother. It went "the only green things he likes are grapes and money." He hated most green vegetables, to the point where mom started to find creative ways to hide them in sauces and stuffings. It wasn't until adulthood that he figured out why he hated salads so much. Or rather that he didn't...he just hated bad salads. Generally the salad we grew up with was iceberg lettuce (bitter and nutrient-poor), bland cheese (mozzarella or tasteless commercial colby-jack) and packaged (over-sweet) dressing.

When he got out of the house and into his own kitchen, he started to experiment. In experimenting, he found out two things...he hated iceberg lettuce, and most off-the-shelf dressings are actually pretty gross. The first time I saw him actually sit down and dig into a plate of what they call "rabbit food" with evident enjoyment, I almost had to check him for signs of alien abduction.

He tossed the iceberg (insert rimshot sound here) and started with raw baby spinach and field greens. He chose toppings for taste and quality instead of accepting the traditional (really, does anyone actually like croutons? Unless they're homemade, they're basically stale leftover bread with a little fake butter flavor and decades-old herbs. Yuck.)

Low and behold, he actually found himself liking salad. Low and behold, I followed his example and found that a salad is actually supposed to taste good, not just be bland raw filler material disguised by too much dressing. I found that the cheese to lettuce ratio doesn't have to be anywhere close to equal, if you buy cheese you can actually taste. That's why I like the little import-cheese cooler in the grocery store instead of the standard dairy case. You find cheese that actually tastes like cheese instead of tasting like thick oil or slightly musty butter :-)

So, in honor of the first seriously winter day this year, I present my brother's perfect harvest salad:



Raw baby spinach and/or mixed field greens (I like 1/2 and 1/2 spinach and "spring mix" that uses baby lettuces, endive and mustard greens)

Extra-extra sharp cheddar cheese, (the sharper the better) cubed or crumbled.

roasted sunflower seeds, salted or unsalted according to your taste.

Dried cranberries

Dried Cherries

Grape Tomatoes. I personally hate raw tomatoes, but they work well on this salad for those who like them.



My brother stops there and eats it dry. I like either a fruity vinaigrette (cherry or raspberry) or a really sharp italian dressing to provide a foil against the sweetness of the dried fruit.



Since then, about five years ago, I've re-discovered salad as a good thing, a thing to crave because it tastes good, not an instrument of torture to keep from being too hungry on a "diet".

Wait...what happened to the epidemic?

So after years of extremist scare tactics and scientists screaming from every rooftop that the Nation, nay the WORLD is getting fatter by the very second, that our children were at risk from the DEADLY and contagious disease of fat and if we didn't do something drastic, we would all become enormous blobs living in little floating chairs sucking down 5000 calories a day and die of diabetes...leaving the earth to lower life forms (like cockroaches and fundamentalists)

Then, in a trick reminiscent of the stage magician who pulls the tablecloth away while leaving crystal and candlestick undisturbed, the CDC comes out with the astonishing information that there has NOT been a significant increase in the number of obese people in the last five years (since 2003).

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/07newsreleases/obesity.htm

Oh, happy day! The billions of dollars we've been dumping into government tactics and research and programs and banning coke machines in school are finally paying off!

Wait, the trick isn't over yet...what new wonders shall be revealed in our victory over fat? Why, that would be a 2004 CDC report that said...

...wait for it...

That there wasn't a significant increase in the number of overweight or obese people between 1999 and 2002.

http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/short/291/23/2847

Ta Da!

Wait...1999? Isn't that BEFORE all the expensively necessary government programs to combatant this rampant "disease" that's going to overrun the world and kill us all? Does that mean that all the hype, hysteria and marginalization of over a third of the human population was to counter a problem that didn't exist?

hmmm...

Now for the best part...folks know that a magic show isn't a magic show without that finale, that moment where they stop pulling rabbits out of hats and create a wondrous disappearing act that leaves the audience breathless. In this case, the magicians at the CDC proved as never before that they can actually make facts disappear! Impossible you say? A violation of the natural laws so beloved by our scientific institutions? Well, I say to you that not only can this astounding feat be accomplished, but a further wonder is in store! Not only will the CDC make facts disappear, but in a dark act of magical transformation they shall re-appear...

...as propaganda!

A gasp falls over the crowd...dieting women faint away with astonishment and malnutrition,
children scream...

Thank you everyone, please tip your waitresses...

Ok, so I take the analogy too far. It's a Friday. I missed breakfast because I had to chase down an escaping cat before work this morning and I get a little punchy :-) Let's try it again.

Despite that their own findings state clearly that there has been no significant increase in obesity rates in almost a decade, the CDC still tries to avert any correlating decrease in its budget by hastily re-assuring us that even though we're not getting fatter, even though we haven't been getting fatter in almost a decade, even though we weren't getting fatter when the government launched it's war on fat....well...we're still fat, right?

Yeah, yeah, that's it. So..like...we weren't trying to keep people from getting fatter, and, like, even if we were..it worked, right? Umm...so yeah we're just trying to make already fat people LESS fat! Yeah, that's it. So...like..don't be fat people. Where's my grant money? Gotta go, I've got a round of golf with GlaxoSmithKline.

Ok, one more time, and see if I can make it through without slipping into cynical mode..

In the face of their own evidence that "obesity" has not increased since 1999, and of increasingly frequent findings by others that fat doesn't cause all the nasty health issues attributed to it (in one of the greatest causality vs. correlation debacles since phrenology), they're still hanging on to the obesity fight like a hyena on a baked ham. Perhaps there's just too much at stake considering the millions they've poured into research, grants, school programs and their own staff to handle the load. Maybe they'd rather tackle obesity than a real epidemic, like aids...or stupidity.

Sorry...some days I just can't keep the snark in check. Best not to try, really.

The Fat 50 Project

An exciting new project is in the works, courtesy of Paul and the folks at Big Fat Blog. It's called the "Fat 50" project and seeks to compile a web guide for each of the 50 U.S. states with state-specific legal information for fat people.

Right now, only Michigan has legal protection for fat people built into a non-discrimination statement:

"Both State and Federal laws prohibit discrimination on the basis
of race, color, national origin, religion, disability, age, sex, height, weight or marital status under the U.S.
Civil Rights Acts of 1964 as amended, 1976 MI PA 453, 1976 MI PA 220, Title V of the Rehabilitation Act
of 1973 as amended, and the 1990 Americans with Disabilities Act, as amended.."

In California, they've achieved nondiscrimination policies on a local level in a few cities. San Francisco's is particularly impressive in scope and detail:

http://www.naafa.org/fatf/sf_height_weight.html

The Fat 50 project is a precursor and guide to efforts to enact similar size-protective legislation in all 50 U.S. states by offering information on current legal status, rights, and other pertinent information. It will eventually encompass "Fat 50+" where information is available in other countries and provinces, as volunteers are found to help research and provide that information.

That last bit is key, because a lot of non-U.S. Fat Activists complain the the movement is U.S.-centric. It's a valid complaint on the surface, since most of the active organizations are based in the U.S. and there is a great need in other countries (especially the U.K.!) for support of Size Acceptance. On the other hand, for an American organization to start petitioning a foreign government for any sort of policy change will just be taken as another example of the nosy Yank trying to tell other countries what to do. There are also subtle differences in method, as the in-your-face activism that goes off well in the U.S. will fall resoundingly and disgustedly flat in most of Europe. There's a "flavor" to effective activism that can really only be captured by someone intimately familiar with the culture, its psychology and its symbolism.

If someone wants more Fat Activism in their country, it is necessary that they step up and begin. The U.S. based groups would generally be ecstatic to help and support. If someone in Germany or New Zealand were to take on the research (or recruit others) to complete a "Fat 50" page for their country, it would go up with the rest of them and serve as a jump-off point for further activism.

In other words, change starts at home.

Speaking of, they do need more volunteers for Fat 50! The following states already have coordinators, but I'm sure they'd welcome assistance and input:

Arizona
California
Idaho
Illinois
Massachusetts
Michigan
Minnesota
Missouri
New York
North Carolina
Ohio
Texas
Washington

Don't see your state there? Volunteer by e-mailing Paul. Don't have time yourself? Find someone else who might be interested. Get creative: This would make a fantastic project for School, Scouts, service credits, other organizations for collaboration, etc. It may be a backhanded suggestion, but need to punish your teenager for something? Don't just let them moulder in their room...set them to work :-)

Because, like I said, change begins at home.

Don't Feed The Humans!

This is all over the internet and blogosphere today. Paul Campos is the author of my very-own-first Fat Positive book (The Obesity Myth/The Diet Myth) Which the lovely Tante' Terri was so good as to send me in the mail one day. It really was my first first jump into the "maybe I'm not broken!" head space, from where I ran quickly through the steps of, "wait, does that mean I don't have to dump all this money, time and stress into "fixing" myself?" to "How dare those Ass-Hats out there in the world make me think I'm broken!" and all the way around to, "Poor self-hating, fatphobic ass-hat...here, have a brownie..."

In his new article, he examines the results of a recent study where the data showed one thing:

"Flegal and her colleagues found that, for a whole range of diseases, from Alzheimer's and Parkinson's to infectious illness and most of the major respiratory ailments, "overweight" people face a lower mortality risk than "healthy weight" persons. In addition, they found no difference between the two groups in mortality risk from heart disease or cancer (the nation's two biggest killers, and ones that many people tend to associate with being overweight). Thus, the relative mortality risk, and by extension the overall health, of "overweight" Americans appears to be better than that of "healthy weight" people."

But the conclusions of the researchers said something very, very different. First that somehow the overweight woman is closer to "obesity"

danger Will Robinson!
What is it, Robot, giant talking carrots again?
No Will Robinson, it's much much worse...its FAT!

As if the study even touched on the haphazard methodology behind the "risks" of "obesity". Campos points out that the average woman in the overweight range is closer to the danger of being underweight, which this study finds doubles her chances of various health troubles, than the other end of the scale.

"Second, researchers talk about "quality of life." After all, life expectancy isn't everything. As Manson says, "health extends far beyond mortality rates." According to a New York Times story, Manson is concerned that excess weight makes it difficult for people to move around, and therefore impairs their quality of life. That's part of "the big picture in terms of health outcomes," Manson says. The notion that an average-height woman who weighs between 146 and 175 pounds is going to find it difficult to move about is as good an example as one could hope to find of what eating disorder experts call "anorexic ideation." Here again, we see how an argument which may make sense when talking about extremely fat people is transferred onto people who are "fat" only in the sense that they don't conform to a radical preference for extreme thinness--a preference which is one of the key explanations for why we're saddled with a scientifically bogus definition of what constitutes a "healthy weight.""

And then, once again, we're reminded that science has evolved to take on the earmarks of religion. Or, was it ever very far off? After all the Alchemists were early scientists, and devoted to their beliefs as fervently as any nun kneeling in her cell and giving up the material world for the peace of conviction.

"Still, when the entire public health establishment has put its stamp of approval on a definition, those who have staked their professional reputations on the accuracy of that definition aren't going to be deterred by something like, well, evidence. Predictably, Willett, who has been perhaps the most prominent proponent of the idea that people ought to try to maintain very low weights, was outraged by the latest refutation of his theories: "It's just ludicrous to say there is no increased risk of mortality from being overweight," he told The Washington Post."

If they were alchemists, or investigators into the chemical structure of some weird African Frog or portugeuse reef crab, I'd say let them quarrel peacefully in their own delusions. Unfortunately, we are the African Frogs. I am the Portugeuse reef crab. The fact that they are having so difficult a time accepting the evidence of their own methods says something about the uphil battle for Fat Acceptance. On the other hand, the fact that their evidence contradicts their own beliefs says something about It's accuracy, for how many scientists find only exactly what they're looking for, no matter how hard they have to mine the data to get it? Which means that whether or not they cling to their beliefs, they have given us a tool to educate others. So we should thank them.

Poor self-loathing fat-phobic researchers....here, have a brownie.

When I Can No Longer Hide...

Watching Joy Nash's Fat Rant videos, the one segment that hit closest to home was where she looked around and went through the litany of excuses that has hovered in the back of my own mind since fourth grade.

I can't talk to that guy, why would he be interested? I'm fat. If he's not interested, it's because he thinks I'm hideous. Because I'm fat. That has to be the reason, right?

But wait, she says, there are so many other reasons. I'm a bitch! I can be selfish. I can be mean...But what does all that matter when I can just say, that person won't like me because I'm fat?

When you let a physical characteristic define you, there's always the danger of it so overshadowing every non-physical characteristic that it becomes a shield, a weapon and a hiding place. If I assume that people will only react to my fatness, then it gives me no motivation to work on those parts of my personality that might stand out if I were thin. It gives me my own personal whipping boy to hide behind and justify my many actual flaws.

Personally? I can be both mean and petty. I've always been self-absorbed to some degree. I'm a terrible housekeeper. I often fall into the annoying habit (I know, because it annoys me so much when others do it) of acting like a "know-it-all", and pointing out even pointless errors of fact in any conversation in order to refute them. I smoke too much (since "at all" is really too much). So?

This isn't an exercise in "woe is me" or a moment of self-flagellation. In fact I know of many other "quirks" in my personality that may or may not be something that needs fixing...which is the real point. Fat isn't something I can fix, so by buying into the social illusion that it can, I am provided with a handy occupation that takes a lot of time and worry. Everything else is put on the back burner while I consider my fatness, because it is, in some ways, easier than tackling problems that actually CAN be fixed if I devoted head space to it.

So, fast forward to 2007 and strip away the definition of fat as a fault in need of a solution. Could it be that the guy didn't want to talk to me because I was a cringing mess of self-abuse who wouldn't even make eye contact? How attractive could that be? If I just walked up and smiled, would I have been stripped of my own excuses?

So the fortune cookie of the week: Let a definition become an excuse, and that excuse will become a stumbling block.

(Did you know the fortune cookie was actually invented at the beginning of the 20th century in California, and is pretty much a phenomenon of the U.S. and Canada? ...Ok, so no, I really can't help it. But I can work on it :-) )

Anorexic Model Dies of Heart Failure

This isn't getting a lot of coverage in the media, I picked up the article from Shapely Prose and the F-Word blogs. There have been two high profile deaths amongst runway models in the past few years:

"In August, 22-year-old Uruguayan model Luisel Ramos died during Fashion Week in Montevideo after reportedly surviving on lettuce and diet drinks.

A few months later, it happened again. Twenty-one-year-old Brazilian model Ana Carolina Reston, who was 5'8", was reported to have weighed just 88 pounds at the time -- that's a BMI of 13.5."

and this new one makes me wonder if this is a new trend, or an old trend that was hushed up for many years. Of course most of us remember Twiggy, the British model who set the new standard of extreme thin in the fashion industry, which women are now dying to surpass.

"When Israeli fashion model Hila Elmalich died last week after years of fighting anorexia, she weighed less than 60 pounds."

To put it in perspective, that's an average weight for a six year old child.

In response, Israel is actually putting standards in place where by law a model must have at least a BMI of 19. It would be much more difficult, but more effective as far as public health is concerned, to require all models to undergo screening for disordered eating, because a model with a large bone structure can be seriously anorexic at a BMI of 19. The BMI scales does not take bone structure or muscle mass into account, and is therefore a really, really poor gauge of body fat content. It is an even worse gauge of health, as many professional athletes are considered overweight or obese by the BMI scale.

What I really have to ask about, however, is how her employers could have possibly overlooked her condition. Or could it be that they didn't care? One was quoted in the article as saying that a woman with curves drew attention to her body and away from the clothes. Therefore they like to use extremely thin women who didn't detract from the clothing they modeled. Isn't that a backhanded way of saying they don't want the models to be prettier than the clothes? So why are they held up as standards of beauty?

I say again, bravo to Jean-Paul Gaultier for standing against the tide. Even if it is only a promotional gimmick :-)

Velvet D'amour

The following videos are about Velvet D'amour, a Jean-Paul Gaultier runway model helping to re-define feminine beauty in France. I've also a link to a 2006 interview that I think really shows her in-your-face spirit. The third video is in French, but expresses a lot of the same ideas she reiterated in the text interview. If anyone would really like a translation, I'll slog through and give it a go.

Recipe: Caramelized Pear Custard Tart

Part of size and fat acceptance is, of course, learning to love food again. It should be our friend, not our enemy. It should be a thing of pleasure, not shame. When listening to our own bodies, we know what it needs, when we're hungry, and when we're full.

I'm a foodie (i.e. lover of good food), and love to cook. I'm a novice really, but I improvise well :-) Since a lot of my favorite foods are the result of experiments, I've decided that I will be occasionally sharing various creations that have tested well, using my wonderful friends and family as kitchen guinea pigs. They still volunteer, despite the very occasional horrific recipe failures :-) I'll try to keep recipes categorized by the labels at the bottom of the posts for easy reference. This is for the pear custard tart I came up with for my fellow foodie friends, and it sounds more complicated than it really is. I added the ground pecans for this Thanksgiving and it worked well.

You'll need:

Ingredients:
3 large ripe pears (I like to use d'anjou or red pears)
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
8 large egg yolks
1 egg white
1 cup heavy cream
1 vanilla bean or 2 tsp Mexican vanilla, or 3 tsp extract
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
2 tsp cinnamon
1 whole nutmeg or 1 tsp nutmeg
1/4 cup ground pecans
1 batch of standard chilled short dough, or 1 store-bought pie crust
1 1/2 lb package of Mascarpone cheese (cream cheese might work as a substitute, but the flavor might be too strong)

NOTES: The pears should be almost overripe, at their softest and sweetest. If you use vanilla instead of a vanilla bean (and I don't blame you, they're ridiculously expensive!) I highly recommend that you look for Mexican pure vanilla instead of the standard extract. It can often be found near the regular spices, in the international aisle if the store has one, or (much less expensive) at a Mexican grocery store. We've got a few in Michigan, and they're great for spices (including whole nutmeg) and harder to find items like Mole' sauce. I personally think the pure vanilla makes a big difference to the taste of desserts. It's stronger in flavor, so you would use approx. 3/4 the amount that you would extract in other recipes. The measurements in my recipes always assume Mexican vanilla.

Equipment:

A double boiler, or two pots that fit inside each other with at least 1/4 inch clearance around the sides (to allow steam to escape) and a handle or hook to keep the smaller one from sinking inside the larger one.
1 small (quart) saucepan
1 large frying pan with lid
a 10" nonstick springform round pan (a nonstick pie dish, tart dish or casserole dish will also work)
2 whisks
1 wooden spoon
mixer or hand mixer
fine grain mesh sieve or cheesecloth
large mixing bowl
parchment paper (found in baking supplies or cake decorating aisle)
1 large bag (volume of your baking dish) of dry beans or rice
nutmeg grater if not using powdered (fresh is always better)

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 F

Crust:
Roll out the shortdough as thin as is workable. Fit it, or the pie crust, into the baking dish. Freeze for at least 1/2 hour (this keeps the sides from slumping during baking).
When dough is frozen, line the crust with parchment paper and fill to the top with dry beans or rice. (the weight keeps the dough from getting puffy. You can also use professional "pie weights")
Bake at 350 for 20 minutes.
Remove the beans/rice and parchment paper
Brush egg white onto entire surface of crust
Return to oven and bake an additional 10 minutes or until browned. Remove from oven and set aside.

Lower oven heat to 325 F

Pears:
Core, peel, quarter, and slice pears no more than 1/8" thick
Melt 1/2 cup butter in large frying pan over medium-low heat. Add 1/2 cup brown sugar, 1 tsp cinnamon, and stir until sugar is melted.
Add pear slices and cover. cook for approx. 20 minutes, stirring often. Turn heat down if mixture is rapidly boiling or starts to brown.
remove the pear slices from the caramel, and layer them in the bottom of the baked crust. Return the pan with the caramel to the heat, reduce to low/simmer and continue cooking throughout the preparation of the filling, stirring occasionally. If mixture thickens (i.e. drip a bit from the spoon and it retains its shape for a moment before smoothing out) reduce heat to lowest setting to keep it warm without cooking.

Custard:
Set up large mixing bowl with mesh sieve over the top. Have the mixer ready and plugged in.
Empty the container of Mascarpone cheese into the mixing bowl.
Add water to bottom pot or bottom of double boiler until the top is floating 1 inch above bottom. Heat on high until boiling.
In the meantime, pour 1 cup cream into small saucepan. Slice Vanilla Bean lengthwise and add it, or add 1 tsp vanilla. Heat on medium-low, stirring often with a whisk, until simmering. Fish out the vanilla bean. Let simmer during next step.
When water in the bottom of the double boiler is boiling, reduce to medium. In the top pot, combine sugar, 1 tsp vanilla, 1 tsp cinnamon, and egg yolks. Have the whisk ready because you must begin whisking the mixture the moment the egg yolks touch the pot and not let up for at least 10 minutes, or else you will get little egg chunks in your custard. The mixture will eventually thicken to a pudding-like consistency and begin to hold its shape (aka soft peak). When it does, begin to temper in the cream from the other pot, whisking as you go. Continue to cook/whisk for an additional two minutes.
Remove the filling from the double boiler and pour through the mesh sieve into the large mixing bowl to remove any egg bits that evaded the whisk. As soon as it's in, set the mixer to high to mix in the mascarpone until smooth. Beat for an additional minute.

Assembly:
Fill the baking dish approx. 1/2 way with the custard mix.
sprinkle the ground pecans over the mix
Gently add another layer of custard mix until 1/2 inch from the top
Stir the caramel on the stove and remove from heat. Pouring in a fine line, or using a spoon, criss-cross the top of the custard mix so that the caramel is distributed evenly over the custard (it will sink into the top layer)

Bake:
Bake at 325 F for 30-40 minutes, or until moderately firm. If you have a deeper dish it will take longer. The center can be a little wobbly (it'll firm up more as it cools).
As soon as it comes out of the oven, sprinkle/grate nutmeg over the top.
Serve when cooled to slightly above room temperature with a slightly acidic dessert wine.

Happy Thanksgiving!

It's amazing the minefield of mixed messages you find at Thanksgiving. So many people are agonizing over the conflict of enormous amounts of what they consider "bad food" and the inevitable guilt, actual guilt over what they eat. One of my theories is that the increasing social freedoms and decay of Mrs. Grundy has simply re-directed the angst. People need a new definition of correctness and propriety in life, so they re-direct it to food. Control issues maybe? All I know is that the office talk on Monday morning will be less about family, friends, good times, good jokes, good wine, good game, then it will be endless variations of "oh I ate too much I'll have to spend days at the gym to work it off...."

I wonder what would happen if we found a way to remove the guilt of food, and just learned to enjoy each others' company? Would all the "holiday stress" be halved? Would the dynamics of judgement by distant relatives change? Sure, there's still the stress of shopping, cleaning, decorating, putting up with weird uncle Al, but somehow all the magazine racks for the next two months will only go from screaming "How to stay slim through the Holidays" and "How to resist holiday treat temptations" to "How to lose those holiday pounds..."

Why would anyone want to trade days and weeks of inner torment and self-flagellation for a slice of pie and contentment? Why would I want to resist, regret, wonder?

Short blog today, I have to go and bake a luscious, carb-filled, calorie laden custard tart with carmelized pears, crushed pecans, and homemade cinamon cajeta......

And damnit, I'm going to eat a slice too :-)

Couple denied entry into New Zealand because of weight

A UK man seeking to emigrate to New Zealand was hired as a submarine cable inspector and supervisor by Telecom. When he applied for his visa, he was denied entry. Why?

"His employer-backed skills visa was initially rejected by immigration officials when they discovered that his body mass index, or BMI, was 42, making him morbidly obese under New Zealand regulations."

So who was this slovenly couch potato? A Welsh rugby player, a former soldier.

"My doctor laughed at me. He said he’d never seen anything more ridiculous in his whole life. He said not every overweight person is unhealthy or unfit."

New Zealand now has a policy of denying entry visas for those it claims "will be a drain on the health system" and claims to have no idea how many people have been turned down based on weight. They use, by the way, the BMI scale as a determinant, which doesn't take muscle weight into account. As a point of reference, the majority of the U.S. National Basketball Association would be considered overweight or obese.

The man went on a crash diet and lost two inches, doing who-knows-what damage to his system, just to be able to get into the country. His wife, however, had to stay behind until she could lose enough weight to be an "acceptable" immigrant.

So the main argument was that fat people cost the health care system more, in a country that has nationalized health care. In addition to the lack of evidence that weight, rather than lifestyle, has ANY effect on health care costs, the article states:

Mr Trezise has private health care in New Zealand and his employer, Telecom, has a gym membership scheme."

So with the health care costs taken care of by a private company, could it be that New Zealand simply doesn't want fat people there? Even though the country is "critically short of skilled workers"? Are they seriously willing to take their image of a thin country so far as to shoot their economy in the foot?

On the other hand, some would say, he could always choose to stay in the U.K. But fat discrimination is so rampant there that they actually feel it is in the national interest to deny access to in-vitro fertilization to obese women (even though they allow it for smokers, heavy drinkers, those with congenital disorders, etc.) and institute a mandatory weighing of grade school students, going so far as to recommend lap-band surgery for obese youth. They're so afraid of the overinflated "guesstimates" of health care costs from obesity that they're willing to pay for a dangerous, ineffective cosmetic surgery with a 40% complication rate in the first few years, often ending in death, malnutrition, and organ failure.

I'd want to leave too.

Photographic Phobia

Sure, I could start off logically with a list of research, resources, and information on size acceptance, and I probably will return to that sort of information in the next few weeks. On the other hand, while a blog is, by nature, written to the public, I plan to begin with the approach of "it's my website, and I'll blog what I want to."

So I wanted to continue a post I made on a topic in the forums at Big Fat Blog which began as a discussion of double chins in photographs.

Photographs and video are "the last frontier" of self acceptance. Not just in fat people, but particularly in fat people. You can be comfortable in your skin, stand up for your rights as a human being, celebrate a healthy lifestyle, and all that can still fly out of the window at the sight of a picture of your double chin from a bad angle. It's a Pavolovian reaction instilled in us from birth by subtle and overwhelming pressure to fear being different. From childhood games "One of these things is not like the other..." to an endless stream of women held up as role-models and airbrushed into faint clones of an imaginary ideal woman as determined by self-loathing executives of fashion. It's so deeply instilled, "Brave New World" style, that only a conscious and deliberate mental detox can check it.

The topic began with a very pretty girl talking about how she considered throwing away one of her wedding photos because it showed an extra chin. She put on the mental brakes, and realized that the photo was in every other respect a good one, and ended up keeping it. I think that's marvelous, and shows great strength of character. On my part, it made me realize something else. I went through four books of photos from the last 15 years, and several digital archives. Out of all the places I've been, all the things I've done, I only have, at most, five or six photographs of myself that I consider "keepers". Not only do I discard great photos, but I've pushed friends and family to trash great pictures because I don't like the way I look in them. The result is a type of lonely invisibility. There was the year spent in Europe, with pictures of ancient buildings and crowds of laughing exchange students. I always volunteered to hold the camera, so there are only two pictures with me in them. There's roadtrips full of sunsets, and shots of laughing friends flashing peace signs or making faces at odd roadside attractions. The only pictures of me in the lot are carefully posed, carefully flattering mugshots. I know I was there because I was holding the camera, but a stranger looking through the collection would have no idea who was experiencing these frozen moments, even though they represented the best times of my life.

So what is the meaning of a sunset over the ocean, without me in frame? The sun sets in that particular spot every single night, 365 days a year, and has done so for milennia. Sure, a snapshot of my friends at the Appalachain overlook is grand, but if I'm not in there with them, isn't it just a picture of some people and a mountain that thousands of people drive by every day? What gives a picture meaning is not just the view, it's the event, the context, the personal connection. If I remove a picture because the image of me doesn't match the image planted in my subconscious mind as ideal, I remove myself from the memory of a place and take only the position of distant observer. The result is a sterile, disposable postcard.

I don't pick through the pictures for others, eliminating one because a person is squinting and another because they look stoned. I consider that part of the memory (remember that one? He looks like hell. He decided we could make the mountains if we drove all night and he was on two energy drinks and a pot of roadside coffee...we spent more time stopping so he could pee it out than we would have stopping at a hotel!) The stuff that looks awful on film is usually what makes the best stories. Perfectly poised and coiffed like a glamour shot tells no story, and could be done at home with the right backdrop. That one where I look like three days of hell just proves that we had a hell of a lot of fun.

So, and I hope to follow my own rede on this one: live without regrets. If you love your self, then you can't be afraid to capture it on film. Strike a semi-dirty pose with the giant concrete elephant. Dig your toes in the sand for that sunset backdrop. Smile and squint and laugh at the bad ones, but keep them anyway. Hand the camera to a trustworthy stranger and jump into the middle of that shot with the whole gang. Don't worry about chins or rolls or frizzy hair because it's the only proof you'll ever have that you were there, and you did that, and you bought the lousy tee-shirt :-)

Welcome!

This blog is something of a compromise, really. Along with a million other drones, I actually have a Myspace (www.myspace.com/jogeek), on which I occasionally blog. My friends are good people, and we hang out on a regular basis, but I've just recently become a member of a cause. There are two drawbacks to being a member of a cause, from the viewpoint of friends:

1. Since the friends came before the cause, they don't necessarily share any interest in it whatsoever.

2. Despite that disinterest, the standard psychology of it, call it "convert" or "born again" headspace, NRE, etc., makes the new member want to talk about their new cause all the time.

In other words, even I can see that I'm getting rather annoying. It's a true sign of friendship that they've stuck it out this long with only minimal eye rolling and a real willingness to offer support for friendship's sake. Sure, there's some concern that I'm turning into a wide-eyed fanatic who's going to wind up on the evening news for throwing whipped cream at bariatric surgery doctors while carrying big photos of amputated stomachs,

...actually that's a good mental image, let me hold onto that for a moment....

At any rate, being an extensive dilettante, I've created this blog to help me organize my thoughts, experiences, data, and activism on Size Acceptance in a single place, separate from the many other facets of my life. Separate because while Fat is part of who I am, it is not the whole me.

Resolution for my Environment

1/19/10:  Purge and organize cosmetics
               Done 1/23/10!  Threw away 1/3 or so and sorted the rest into zones.  Summary Here.

1/26/10:  Clean out center drawers of kitchen hutch  (Fail!)

2/3/10:  Clean out center drawers of kitchen hutch

.

Quotes on Problem Solving

“When faced with a problem you do not understand, do any part of it you do understand, then look at it again.” -  Robert Heinlein

"Achievement is not the same thing as happiness. "  -Andy Borowitz

Quotes Index

Quotes on Fat Acceptance

Problem-Solving

Literary Rules for Living

MISCELLANEOUS:

"You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do." ---Anne Lamott

"Do you really think ... that it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations that it requires strength, strength and courage, to yield to. To stake all one's life on a single moment, to risk everything on one throw, whether the stake be power or pleasure, I care not -- there is no weakness in that."
-OSCAR WILDE, An Ideal Husband

“The best way out is always through.”
-Robert Frost

“I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather.”
-Goethe

"It is a common mistake on the part of cooler, self-contained natures to assume that those who have a giving and ebullient character are what they are only because they cannot help it—that they are fed from a spring that will never stop rather than a reservoir that can be exhausted. Hence the feeling of stark disbelief or unpleasant shock on the part of others when the reservoir of effort and energy—for it turns out to be a reservoir—is almost gone….the principal reward for those who give lavishly rather than meagerly is the expectation that they remain true to form and continue to give."
- W. Jackson Bate

“Everything turns out to be valuable that one does for one’s self without thought of profit.”
-Marguerite Yourcenar

"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy."
- Guillaume Apollinaire

“We are never so much disposed to quarrel with others as when we are dissatisfied with ourselves.”
- William Hazlitt

"Jo: Are you trying to tell me I block the light?  JD: I'd rather say your beauty shines with a light all its own...which is nevertheless hard to read by."

"Hey I only scored moderate in neuroticism on the personality test.  That's a relief because I was really worried about it."  -Jo

Quotes on Fat Acceptance

“this country is suffering from a manifest destiny of the thin…” - AngryGrayRainbows



"For some men, the only thing more intolerable than the sight of a powerful woman is the sight of a powerful woman they don’t want to sleep with." - Paul Campos (on media criticism of Supreme Court nominees' physical appearance)


"I am not about getting rid of thin models, what I am about is diversifying our notion of beauty so that it is more inclusive because I feel at present there are so many people who suffer due to an unattainable beauty ideal." - Velvet D'amour


"Every age has its dominant caste. This is the age of the zealot...The overweening state, by dint of the efforts of the zealots, demands the right to determine the shape of its clients." -John Brignell (via JFS)


"Debunking the idea that some Ugly, automatically inferior group, even exists, is a difficult task..." -http://bigliberty.wordpress.com/


"Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked "female". " - Erin, http://www.dressaday.com


"It doesn’t take too much time spent lurking on the [fatosphere] blogs to see why they liken their struggles to a fight for civil rights. In fact, they are fighting for our civility." -Lucinda Breeding, Denton Record-Chronicle


“As I’ve said before, if you think fat people have no self-discipline, consider the fact that they haven’t killed you yet.” - Miss Conduct, Boston Globe


"So, would transubstantiated communion wafer be carb, or protein?" - Phledge (on Shapely Prose)


"...the 'deaths attributable to obesity' statistics classify all dead obese people as killed by their fat, even if they were murdered with a tuning fork by evil clowns from outer space." -Rio (She Dances on the Sand)


"To hell with tiny pants!" -Cacie (Livejournal, via SP)


"If you’re fat and claim you don’t sit on the couch eating baby-flavored donuts all day, you are a liar." - Kate Harding (Shapely Prose)


"...the terror of carbs or the horror of fats or the menace of corn syrup or the, I don’t know, delicate ennui of riboflavin." - Fillyjonk (Shapely Prose)

"“But about a month before my friend Pammy died, she said something that may have permanently changed me.  We had gone shopping for a dress for me to wear that night to a nightclub with the man I was seeing at the time. Pammy was in a wheelchair, wearing her Queen Mum wig, the Easy Rider look in her eyes. I tried on a lavender minidress, which is not my usual style. I tend to wear big, baggy clothes. People used to tell me I dressed like John Goodman. Anyway, the dress fit perfectly, and I came out to model it for her. I stood there feeling very shy and self-conscious and pleased. Then I said, 'Do you think it makes my hips look too big?' and she said to me slowly, 'Annie? I really don’t think you have that kind of time.'" --Anne Lamott (as quoted at http://www.happiness-project.com/)

"no woman’s health can be measured by whether or not Alex Rodriguez wants to fuck her." --Ragen, from Dances With Fat

Project Inspiration

This is a random inspiration board for projects I may tackle at one point or another.  Hopefully this will allow me to reference interesting projects later instead of needing to jump right in and do it NOW.  These are physical craft and construction projects, not self-improvement.

Litterbox Hideaway
http://unclutterer.com/2008/10/18/litter-box-hideaway/
http://unclutterer.com/2007/09/25/sleek-way-to-hide-kitty-litter-box/


Pebble Mat for Winter Shoes
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/chicago/organizing/10-ways-to-deal-with-slushy-shoes-103075

Re-cover Antique Chair (or sofa)
http://www.readymade.com/blogs/johnsons/2009/12/01/my-road-to-recover-y/

Growing Bamboo in Michigan
http://www.americanbamboo.org/GeneralInfoPages/GrowingBambooIndoors.html
http://www.lewisbamboo.com/tessinfo.html
http://www.plantdelights.com/Catalog/Current/Detail/02123.html

Links

This is a random collection of links I've visited or found with something interesting on them, or that I want to reference later.  I'll sort it if it gets too long, but until then it'll serve as a sort of word-art expression of my dilettente brain. 

Six Ways to Eat a Grapefruit
http://whenharrymetsalad.wordpress.com/2009/03/16/grapefruit-extravaganza/

LuLu (self-publishing)
http://www.lulu.com/

Custom-tailored jeans:
http://www.makeyourownjeans.com/

Open Learn: Autistic Spectrum
http://openlearn.open.ac.uk/course/view.php?id=3569&topic=all

This is Sand
http://thisissand.com/

Passive Aggressive Notes.com
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garden_Gnome_Liberationists
University of Pennsylvania Happiness questionnaires
http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx

To Read

This is where my "To Read" list will be maintained.  I've often come across a title that sounds fascinating, but rarely write it down or record it somehow to look up later.  Feel Free to leave recommendations in the comments!  I generally read literature (e.g. Austen, Dinesen, Wolfe, Bronte, Shakespeare, Tolstoy, Kafka, Gogol, Conrad) with some classic science fiction (e.g.  Heinlein, Asimov, Sturgeon) and the occasional very well written modern novel (e.g. Terry Pratchett, Neil Gaiman).

TO READ:

Flannery O’Connor, Wise Blood
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love.
Elias Canetti, Crowds and Power
Elias Canetti, Auto-da-Fe
Georges Bataille, The Accursed Share: Consumption
Thorstein Veblen, The Theory of the Leisure Class
St. Therese of Lisieux, Story of a Soul
Robert Calasso, The Marriage of Cadmus and Harmony
Virginia Woolf, The Waves
Alexander et al., A Pattern Language
Randall Jarrell, The Animal Family
George J. Thompson, Jerry B. Jenkins, Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain, by Dr. Betty Edwards
Chronicles, by Bob Dylan
The Artful Edit: On the Practice of Editing Yourself, by Susan Bell

Resolutions for Finances

2/3/10:  Eat breakfast at home and pack/bring a lunch to work every day (no takeout, no deli, no purchasing food during the day).

2/3/10:  Restrict groceries to $80/week

Literary Rules for Life

“when faced with a problem you do not understand, do any part of it you do understand, then look at it again.” - Robert Heinlein

"When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up. "
-CS Lewis


"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."
-Robert A. Heinlein

"'Begin at the beginning,' the King said, very gravely, 'and go on till you come to the end: then stop.'"

- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

"Don't Panic."  -Douglas Adams

Sewing Index

.....

General Sewing

Making a Dress Dummy to Fit You
Copycat your Clothes

SAAS (Sewing At Any Size) Series

SKIRTS

Basic Gored/Panel Skirt

Variations on the Gored Skirt (insets, wrap skirts, lined/reversible skirts)

Pleated Skirt (and pleated curtains)

Peasant Skirt

Necktie Skirt

Necktie Skirt:  Fitting Pears
Circle Skirt

TOPS

Super-Fab Retro Halter Top

Basic Camisole Top

Variations on the Camisole Top (Scoopneck, Lace, Gathered Neck, Tee-Shirt Conversion)

Sleeved Tee or Knit Shirt

LINGERIE/SWIMWEAR

Basic Panty/Bikini Bottom
String Bikini/Fatkini Top 
Bandeau Bikini Top

TROUBLESHOOTING and HACKS

Part 1  (Button Gap, Dying, Fit Alterations)

Shorten your Jeans (without looking like you have)

Size Up a Cardigan or Button-Front Shirt
Tricks for Business Wear

COSTUMES

Men's Peasant Pants and Tunic

Half-Circle Cloak

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Recipe Index

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Appetizers and Sides: 
Crabmeat Rangoons
Lemon Sauteed Asparagus (Gluten-Free)
Hot Spinach-Artichoke Dip (Gluten Free)
Spicy Dandelion Greens (Gluten-Free)
Garlic Mustard - Invasive Species Recipe Link (Gluten-Free)
Pico de Gallo, Guacamole, Chilequiles (Gluten-Free)
Leftover Tortillas: Chilequiles, Corn Chips, Tortilla Soup
Homemade Plum Sauce with Sweet Cherries (Gluten-Free)


Main Dishes: 
Quick and Easy Beef Stew Pot Pie
Sweet Baked Ham with Red-Eye Gravy (Gluten-Free)
Jo's Perfect Pot Roast (Gluten-Free)
Authentic Mexican Tacos
Spicy Cinnamon Swiss Chicken Nachos (Gluten-Free)
Rosemary Balsamic Roast (Gluten-Free) 
Pecan-Crusted Chicken Strips (Gluten-Free)
Gluten-Free Lasagna with Summer Vegetables


Soups: 
Old Fashioned Chicken Noodle Soup
Easy Spicy Winter Soup (Gluten-Free)
Leftover Tortillas: Chilequiles, Corn Chips, Tortilla Soup


Salads:
 Avacado Pecan Bleu Salad with Blackened Chicken (Gluten-Free)


Breads:
 Banana Bread (and Banana Bread French Toast)
Gluten-Free Apple Spice Coffee Cake (Gluten-Free)
Gluten-Free Buttermilk Pancake Mix (Gluten-Free)


Desserts: 
Blueberry Tarts with Pecan Streusel
Strawberry-Rhubarb Upside-Down Cake
Candied Rose Cookies
Rice Pudding (Gluten-Free)
Tiramisu
Caramelized Pear Custard Tart
Gluten-Free Crepes (Gluten-Free)

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Resolutions - Health

1/15/10:  Eat a grapefruit every day prepared in a different way.
               Done!  Best with salt instead of sugar, or prepared in savory dishes. The exception was the
               Grapefruit-squirt sorbet.

1/26/10:   Try at least three recipes with capers in them.